Amorous Comedy

“I thought of writing a summary about you, but when I finished it was a book.” 

Of course, it’s a game. Life itself is. Do you remember when I said about that one person who was better at these than me- it’s You. Even without knowing You played with my heart and shattered it into million pieces.

You are the best and worst thing ever happened to me.You created me, made me-- the new me.

Now fate has changed its course-- now the game is mine.

And yes, It’s about revenge but I feel pity- pity for your poor soul. You don’t worth my time,my wrath, my desire for revenge. If I wanted I could have destroyed,ruined you enough to make you crawl like once you made me. You know why....because you might have been good but I’m still the best.

Now, I know it was just another feeling that I fell for you cause I hardly knew anyone else. My world was a tiny bit of sphere starting and ending with u,like a planet revolving around Sole. But those days are long gone.

That stupid little girl who mentally designed her own wedding dreams,set the names for the children,planned an eternity together, again the same girl who cried for endless time hiding in the dark or in the shower to wash off the salted cheeks, scrubbed her skin out to remove the last trace of your touch,to forget your scent,prayed to have you safe and hoped to get you back.

She thought it to be another nightmare which would soon be over- which never actually happened. Rather it was a tight hard slap on her face to drag her into reality.

Your last words, “ We can’t even be friends, leave and stay away from me. Even if I don’t get what I want, I’m not coming back to you.”

It’s my thought of revenge that bonded us till now, for three years are nothing-- I’d died everyday waiting for you, and was willing to do so forever. You made me dream and vulnerable, then you broke me and strong. I was burning in hell anyway, all I wished for you to return, and like a phoenix I would be reborn from my own ashes.

Once I wanted you to come back,to knit our future together—our story, ups-n-downs, separation and reunion, to be an inspiration to the whole universe.

But Alas!! Now I feel nothing- no pain,no more sufferings,no torments, or dreams-n-screams, or sleepless nights--all miseries,distresses are over. For you are nothing to me- a bloody nobody.

It’s for your own good I've spared you. Just a little game, and you’re half way to hell. If this continues, destiny has the worst plan for you waiting. You wouldn't die, I won’t let that happen---spilling your dirty blood on my hands, as that would be a favor to you. Instead I’d take you until a step ahead death, bring you back and drag you back through the same path. Again and Again and Again. Till, you beg for death himself- and I, the merciful Satan’s mistress would grant your wish leaving you behind- simply hanging, dripping like a ripped-out soul chained in the pit with Chaos as a guard.

But then again, i ask myself. Are  you even unworthy enough for that???

You, just a fucked-up mundane who had seen  the world with half-shut eyes. A mere fun, little personal entertainment show.

The answer is my revenge didn't end for it had never started in the first place. For you a filthy lucky swine whom I let go thinking as a charity-case,too damn lucky to even deserve my words.

I want you to feel the pain I felt, when you left me weak on my knees without even looking back once.

I want you to burn for every soul you have cheated,destroyed.

I want you to get damaged and unable to think straight just like a living dead.

I want you feel to ache,grief that will eat you from inside making you puke your life out.

Either i know you too well or don’t know at all. I could have crashed you long before cause you’re weak,spineless,easy pick but I couldn't for I was still a fidget and crazily,hopelessly in love with you or at least I thought so back that time.

Things have changed,situations are different, the world is wider. Though I remember every single details of my time with you and without, but I don’t care any more.

Leo – A Leo I’m, we don’t lie,we don’t cry but once I did both- only for you. Again Leo am I, we are strong, we love to play and we play only to win. If you’re still alive consider it as a miracle, though you had lost the game, all your bets have been pardoned.

Those days of--happy ending, made for each other, start-crossed lovers—all  bullshit fictional versions of fairytale,prince charming and white knight, no more exist. Time of facing the real world and surviving, if I’m over you that’s the biggest gift you get from me.

 I've wasted enough of my time,words,emotions for you—it’s time to take them all back. 

Everyone has their definitions for love, I guess mine is burnt along with my soul. Thus, the only guilt I’ll carry to my grave, I might have released you but I killed my love,my heart—a love so precious which could have bloom,enjoying shines and warmth of a whole new range, but stopped before its time because you somewhere crossed its way. 

Like an old, dark monster destroying innocence,beauty just by stepping on it, crushing into the ground.

But these are just all my cravings, even though they might not effects you, for maybe harming the person you once loved is mortifying-- pinches,hurts like a motherfucker.